This may be a day late for Valentines but hey, it’s still the love month! Lately, I’ve been reading more non-fictions (taking a break from all those YAs) and one of my current reads is The 5 Languages of Love by Gary Chapman.
The book outlines and explains the 5 ways of love expression called ‘the languages of love‘. The 5 love languages are:
- Words of Affirmation – expressing one’s love through words and compliments.
- Gifts – expressing one’s love through presents (not materialistic); gesture that has been well-thought of and has meaning.
- Quality Time – expressing one’s love through show of ‘real’ and ‘undivided’ attention.
- Physical Touch – expressing one’s love through non-verbal interaction like holding hands, hugging and kissing.
- Acts of Service – expressing one’s love through little favors and doing things to help your love one.
Basically, a person’s primary love language by default is the way he/she wants to be loved and how he/she loves in return. And in a relationship (not just romantic btw), unhappiness roots when couples fail to know and understand their partner’s own love language.
I haven’t finished the book yet however on Gary Chapman’s site, he added a quiz that would determine your own (and partner’s) language of love.
I’ve taken the quiz and guess what my love language is?
Honestly, I’m not really that surprised with the result.
For me, nothing screams ‘I Love You’ more than constantly just being with Bong up to the point that it sometimes becomes that cause of our disagreement. I know it’s minsan illogical to demand that he stays at home at all times because I’ve read enough Cosmo articles to know that guys need to have their me/bro times as well, but I just can’t help it. In my mind, if you really love me, you’ll want to spend time with me even if we are technically doing nothing. Okay na okay na ako with just watching basketball or some movies then just make kwento after. Admittedly, with the kids, it has become harder for us to have quality time together and it’s taking a toll on me. I’m not saying that I don’t consider time with our kids not well-spent (IT IS), it’s just that at times I crave for those one on one bonding moments where we can be husband and wife and not just Dad and Mom.
Sooo, taking the quiz just reaffirms what I already know about myself — na ako ay isang napakaclingy na tao haha!
But on a serious note, to fully utilize the languages of love, you’ll want to have your partner know his own too. That way, you’ll BOTH know the correct type of love you need eliminating wasted effort that would in the end be unappreciated. You’ll BOTH have a clearer idea of what actions you’ll perceive as love and was is not. And you’ll have a deeper understand of each other.
Will definitely ask hubby to take the quiz himself 🙂
Guys, I do encourage you to take the quiz as it can be a real eye opener. Who knows you and your partner can learn a thing or 2 about each other that you’re not really aware of?
Let me know what’s your love language in the comment ha!